The Tigers' Blog

The evil worm

redworm

“Today class we will be looking at worms.” Mr Ball yawned in a grey  voice.

” Sir I don’t like worms they’re horrendously slimy!” groaned Bella  putting her head in her hands.

” Bella  don’t use that tone with me. Now come over here to see the worm pushing through the earth,” said Mr Ball quite seriously pointing to the slimy pink creature  hiding in the dirt. “Worms are the only animal with no eyes but can still navigate their way around.” he explained, picking up one of the eyeless animals. But as so as he did it went down his top…



20 Responses to “The evil worm”

  1. Tyler, I thought this was an excellent post. I really liked the “grey voice” (did you get the idea from Mr Blunt in Stormbreaker?) and you’ve used some wonderful vocabulary. Remember that when writing direct speech you need a new line each time the speaker changes. I edited for you this time.

  2. well done Tyler! I also loved how you said “in a grey voice”! Keep it up!!!

    1. Amazing piece of work!
  3. I really liked the word navigate also I liked in a grey voice. I think you got the name mr ball from mr ball our supply teacher.

  4. I really like how you opened with dialogue!

  5. I love the way you started and then built up the tension with a dazzling finish. I look forward to your next piece of work.

  6. :):):):):):):):):):):););););)

  7. Love how you’ve put it in school

  8. A great response to this week’s prompt Tyler. I like the idea of a worm being evil! I wonder how evil the worm would have been if you had had more words to write? Your descriptions are good and keep readers interested and the final sentence is filled with suspense when you think of it with the title.
    Keep up the great writing!
    Nicola Richardson, 100wc team, Tyne and Wear, UK

  9. I liked your clauses on the end of the speech. You have thought hard about your vocabulary. I liked your use of ellipses on the end, I really want to know what happens next. I enjoyed reading your piece of work!

  10. COOL WORM AESOME TYLER

  11. 19 wow!!!!! :0

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